Mom Tip Monday: 10 Toddler Discipline Techniques

I talk a lot in my articles about discipline, and specifically positive discipline. That word, discipline, seems to carry some negative connotations. At least I know my first thought when hearing the word is of a child being scolded or spanked (the way my generation was “disciplined.”)

Positive discipline is about being kind but firm, looking at the source of misbehaviors, finding teachable moments, and treating our kids with respect.

One big thing about any kind of discipline, however, even positive discipline, is the techniques must be related to the child’s age and ability to process and understand what we’re teaching them. Toddlers, for example, can’t rationalize, and grade schoolers aren’t going to go for distraction since they can hold onto an idea for more than a moment.

That said, below is a list of 10 toddler discipline techniques. While toddlers can start responding to these techniques as early as 9-12 months, it never hurts to be training yourself to use them even if you have an infant. Put these to work in your home and watch your child flourish while also learning about appropriate behaviors.

1.    Distract – interrupt a child’s thought and redirect it where you would like it to be. They don’t have the ability to do this on their own.

2.    Ignore – Use this with annoying behaviors that cause no harm. It must be ignored every time it occurs to be effective. The behavior may increase before it stops.

3.    Substitute – Show a child where and/or how to perform the same or similar activity in a way that is acceptable to you.

4.    Comment on Appropriate Behaviors – more often than negative behaviors. Any attention given to any behavior reinforces that behavior. Factual comment often throughout the day.

5.    Intervene Physically – physically remove a child from a potentially dangerous situation. They seldom respond to verbal direction alone.

6.    Use Positive Statements – Reduce the use of “no” and “don’t” when directing your toddler. Tell him what he can do rather than what he should not be doing. Other effective language includes you saying to your child “when you”¦then,” “I expect you”¦” and “you can”¦.” Offer choices when appropriate.

7.    Limit Set – A few easily remembered rules work better than many rules that may be forgotten. Limits need to be age and developmentally appropriate. Think: “Is this rule really important?”

8.    Investigate – What could be the source of the misbehavior? Is your child tired? Hungry? What is going on in his development? What are her temperament traits? Is the surrounding environment stressful? Could he be getting sick? Sometimes the source can be solved, or understood, which helps with the misbehavior.

9.    Nurture – Make time for hugging, talking, reading, snuggling, listening and playing. Undivided attention and uninterrupted, child-directed play each day can be very effective.

10.  Modify Environment – Toddler proof your home. The more freedom your child has to explore his surroundings safely, the less negative attention needs to be placed on him.

Tagged as: discipline techniques, Positive Discipline, toddler discipline